‘The secret my husband’s ex-wife told me’

I married my husband Dan three years ago, and I’ve always known he had a pretty special bond with him Marie’s ex-wife.

He has two children with him and they seem to be separating on good terms, so I’ve never had a problem with him. I like to think that I am a great stepmother to her daughter, and now that I have a girl of my own, our friendship has blossomed.

I wouldn’t say we’re best friends and we don’t really socialize together, but we have a huge mutual respect. My little girl adores her and I absolutely love both girls.

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Couple in lounge
He said he always knew he was close to his ex-wife Marie. (Getty Images/iStockphoto)

I am also very aware that there are many things Marie will know about Dan which I don’t know or understand. They had a decade of marriage, so she had been through a lot with him, especially when he was battling cancer before I met him.

But recently Marie was spending more and more time at our house, and over a drink she told me a secret about Dan that really rocked my world.

He told me that during his marriage to her, he had an intermittent relationship with his cousin’s ex-wife Jill, and – according to Marie – he still talks to her every week.

Well, this is news for me. He made me promise not to tell Dan that he had told me something, but it was a promise that was hard to keep. Instead, I very cautiously started doing a little bit of research.

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Photo of a young couple fighting in their bedroom at home
That’s when the family secret made him feel crushed. (Getty)

I checked our phone records and found a repeating number. I put my phone on private mode and dialed the number and the woman answered with “Jill talking.” I immediately hung up but my heart was beating fast.

Marie said she thought I should know because she’s always been a little jealous of Dan and Jill’s relationship.

How did I not know anything about this before? I lay awake, feeling stressed and insecure, and decided to talk about it with Dan the next day.

“Tell me about your friendship with Jill,” I said, and without batting an eye she said, “Oh, she’s just an old friend.” He told me what I already knew, that she was his cousin’s ex-wife. Then he changed the subject.

Couples against infidelity
Now he didn’t know what to do. (Getty)

The fact that he didn’t even ask why I asked him was very strange to me.

I called Marie and she said, “You need to ask more questions. I don’t mean to scare you, but I’m sure they’ve been together, if you know what I mean.” So Marie suspects Dan is having an affair with Jill when he is married to Marie.

This is where it gets weird, because when I confronted Dan, he said that Jill wanted to continue their friendship but he refused. He says he only ever saw her as a friend and says he will swear on his mother’s life.

So I’m no longer friends with Marie. I believe he is trying to make trouble. I still see her every now and then because I want my daughter to stay close to her stepsisters, but I will never trust Marie again. I’m glad I chose to trust my husband and not his ex-wife.

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